Saturday, December 8, 2012

A Preliminary Goodbye

Greetings to my blog followers, friends, readership, the occasional set of eyes that accidentally popped open this page by no other reason than pure accident,

I bet you would all love to see pictures of Ireland, and perhaps the stories I have to tell, and know about all the wonderful leprechauns I caught, the gold I found, and the redheads I…

Well, we can save that for later…  ;-) just kidding…

Anyways,

I’ve been coming back to my computer over and over again attempting to write about my experience in Ireland, but nothing to my satisfaction was ever scribbled upon these stubborn white pages.

So here I am, in my cold unheated bedroom, etching up not my final goodbye, but a soon to be farewell to all my fellow readers.  I guess if you are wondering why I am biding goodbye to, I must relate to you that I am to return home within the next week and a half.  I am to cross over the Atlantic Ocean by plane, on the cold and blustery evening of December 21st.  And really, the fact of this didn’t really hit me until a few days ago.  I was staring at my calendar, and realizing I still had yet to visit a few places in Viterbo, I went in panic mode etching in little side trips in all my empty days.

But really, as much as I can say traveling has been the mere highlight of everything, there has been so much more to it than the surface level. 

Coming into this, I didn’t really know what to expect.  It was such a big change that I just kind of went with the flow of things, not really having anything in mind of what my life would be like here.  Well, I knew it would include bouts of pizza, lots of pasta, and the occasional gelato, but I didn’t really know what else my life here would entail.  I was excited yet nervous about the language aspect and I was very excited to get to know Italy on a more personal level by staying with a host family.  Also, having signed up for 15 credits, I expected lots of studying, occasional nights out, and I was crossing my fingers to perhaps travel beyond the borders of Italy.

And looking back now, these were all reasonable expectations.  They were all concrete manifestation of life: food, people, the changing of seasons, and the occasional trip outside the country.  They were things I could count, take pictures of, and remember in concrete form forever.

But… all that I’ve taken from my experience here can’t exclusively fit within the boundaries of a photo frame, within the consoles of my cuisine cookbook, or the small souvenir pennies I pocket from each country I visit.  Most of what I’ve taken is sleeping within the pages of my journal, every word, every feeling, and every moment, a pulsation of life that has changed me and altered me into the person that I am today.  It’s hard to put into words how living abroad releases yourself from a certain singularity, a certain perspective lacking so many aspects of peripheral vision.  I feel like I’ve truly come to know an entirely new way of life, new way of being, and new way of seeing the world.  Since peering through my bedroom window by night within the contours of Boise, Idaho, admiring the sauntering mountains wandering away into the distant horizon, I have grown and changed so much, and alas, taken one more step forward becoming the best version of myself, and reaching my goals and tackling challenges that I hadn’t even realized existed.

I really can’t say just how much I have fallen in love with Italy.  I truly hadn’t realized how starkly different the culture was not only from America, but from the rest of Europe, until I visited Austria, France, and Ireland.  I was almost in shock, realizing how much I’ve had to adjust and how truly different the culture is here.  From the language, to the people, to the dress… the concept of time, the way of life… everything has been so outside of my realm of experience and knowledge.  But there is no better way to get to know a people and culture than to just pack up your backs and move in right alongside them.  From meeting Italian friends to tutoring a group of chatty fourth grade girls to teaching at the local high school, I’ve definitely done a lot in order to really understand and come to know this life here beyond the confines of a normal vacation or weekend getaway.

Though I’ve learned a lot, there are probably mountains and mountains of stories, information, and experiences that I will have never yet to have experienced.  I humble myself to the four months I’ve been here, though I’ve appreciated and cherished every moment.  This culture that once seemed so distant has become so alive and now is sewn into my memories and experiences that I’ll cherish forever.  Even from the cold confines of my small bedroom in Piazza della Morte, my frozen snowballed cheeks are still etching up a smile, reminiscing of all the sweet moments that will now be a part of the person I am as I continue on in this great journey we call life.   

And as for my lovely weekend adventure to the Emerald Isle, I will get this up as soon as I can find the moment of day when all my roommates agree to turn the heater on.  For, of this moment, as of 20 minutes ago, it was turned off, and my fingers are now becoming numb as each one wanders about these keys, and no longer am I provided with such luster and inspiration of thought.  Anyhow, I hope you have enjoyed my somewhat premature goodbyes, and check back soon to read about my wonderful adventures in Ireland.

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